Emotional Rollercoaster

Well, last night I fell asleep on the couch at about 7 p.m. Blake woke me up at 7:30 p.m. and suggested we go to bed and just get up really early, because we both had a bunch to get done. Good idea Blake! So, we went upstairs and got ready for bed. By the time my head hit the pillow, Blake and Cozmo were snoozing and I was - you guessed it - WIDE AWAKE.

I lay there with too much to think about. Baby... weight gain... finances... baby... Blake's well being... life... I began to cry. This whole pregnant thing is a shocker. I know my life will change. I dont initially deal well with change. "Change" doesn't even seem like a strong enough word for a family of 2 becoming a family of 3! Yet, I do not know anything about the future. I was overwhelmed. So, I got up and went into the baby's room. I did not want to wake Blake up - he had a final today and plenty on his plate to worry about already. I put together the baby bouncer, picked up some books, put the cover on the changing pad, and packed our overnight bag for the hospital with the baby's items. Nesting? Yeah.

So, when I finally got bored and hit a dead end, I went back to bed. Still couldnt sleep. I turned on the light (which oddly enough does not wake Blake up, but the faintest whisper of his name does). I lay there and thought some more, got overwhelmed and weepy again. So, I got up and got a small snack and my real estate books. I brought them upstairs and sat in bed. Cozmo smelled my snack and got up to sniff around for a few seconds. He made a little noise sniffing. Suddenly, Blake POPPED up, red eyed and confused. He thought Cozmo was about to have an accident in our bedroom. I giggled at him and told him it's okay. They both went back to sleep. Then, I studied some of the Math portion of my real estate class. I am not sure when exactly I went to sleep or how many times I went to the bathroom last night, but eventually I did sleep.

The emotions did not stop there. This morning, I could not stop being anxious during my real estate class. I felt like the next minute was going to take forever to get here, and the next hour, and the next day, etc. Finally, it was time to break and Blake picked me up for my 35 week Doctor's appointment. They poked me (in my arm, with a needle) and prodded me and weighed me... not my favorite things. I cried. I hate the weight gain. How the heck am I supposed to ever be my normal weight again? No idea.

Well, when we got home, I got dressed and went to the gym. I love the elliptical machine. I got the idea of using it a few weeks ago. Last week, I went to the gym 6 times. Each time, I did the elliptical machine for 30 minutes of cardio, and then weight lifted (tiny weights of course) and stretched. This week I have been twice already. It really helps with my emotions, I always feel happier afterwards!

I cant wait for this emotional rollercoaster to stop, so I can jump on a whole new one! Some rollercoasters may be exciting, but it's nice to have a change every now and then.